Sickle Cell & Me

A Poem by Reva Johnson

So much pain in my chest All these demons that caress, my mind shattered All This pain that I held, It’s tragic Can it all be buried like a hatchet? Or Can I rise instead of staying stagnant? As young as I could remember, fighting this agony built from inside Red cells never learning how to act, Only learning how to continuously stack Wanted to be normal but never given the chance The feeling of being different constantly enhanced But how can I explain this feeling Explain what it’s like to feel like a burden? Will anyone understand this pain for certain? Becoming an adult and moving away The first excitement of new possibilities ahead The hope of success and a life with no stress But finally learning that this joy was never meant to be kept Away from family, away from friends Seeing this rugged world through a different lens. The threat of stealing my peace, turned to fear that would never be released The weight of blame and shame, Heavy But physically and mentally Crippling all the same Do you feel the same? How do you give this pain a name ? To try and help you to understand this pain. One day there will be no more pain No more suffering or trying to stay sane You made me hate and blame myself Question myself as if it was all on me All the hateful words you aimed at me But I was expected to be strong Hold it all together because I was the strongest one Ignore the hurt, Ignore the pain Ignore that life for me will never be the same. Then to have not just your mind fail and your heart explode In just a snap of the finger your hips Implode your bones just die and quickly deplete How am I to crack the code when it’s so hard to come to terms When one thing after another takes its toll What happens then to that once beautiful, kind and compassionate soul?

---

💜 Want to stay connected?

You can find me and my work across different platforms! Follow along on Instagram @Chronic_junk_, join the community on Facebook at Chronic Junk, visit my website at ChronicJunk.com, catch behind-the-scenes and creative fun on TikTok @chronic.junk, and don’t forget to keep up with new posts right here on the blog 👉 chronicjunk.blog. Let’s spread awareness and celebrate resilience together! 🌍✨